Monday, May 21, 2007

everything comes to end for this period.

Finally, all is over, no one can imagine the stress at this school, where tons of ppl nt studying here always tot we buys that piece of shit crap.

for the first time, first time in my 16 yrs of studying, i must admit i've been made to slog to my limits. nothing hav ever pushed me tat hard.. oh, nt even close. well, just cudnt compare to my poly days at all.. now, this exams left my a little shocked, a little surpised..

shocked by the intensity, by the high standards.
suprised by the unexpected discoveries of my strengths, and of cos my weaknesses.

sociology paper, big hoo haa. newspaper, news.. students crying outside the exams hall. tat who i tot was a gd fren of mine gave me the crapiest thing i ever heard. watever conflicts i take it like a man, a few days later i will go b joking w him. its just tat i had my reservations nowadays ever since turf club job incident.

and now that sentence sudn b said. it convinced me. he, misplaced our frenship. he sud noe some campb, i dun look back. a man has consequences he has to bear for actions he does. like me, if i studied harder earlier in the yr, i sud had been aiming first class, unlike now hoping for that bonus 2nd class instead.

anyway true frens takes time to show, its a pity it took so long and diden show. but, i'm realli glad tat a few brothers sup me. patrick lee kar keng is a seebee. heck care 'father' type. but he sup me. happy. realli nvr waste i sup him when he at his lowest.

ppl say the most 幸福 thing that can happen, is to find someone that u love. but so? u busy shag from outfield. pegassus. buckspeed. swiftarrow. safka. tigerjack. giantbuaya. type also so many. go thru them worse than typing 100,000 times. no time go out. she screw u. leave for france. u think she will sup u. frens u busy v long nvr see dem.. nvr call dem.. they sup u. so which one more 幸福? think abt it.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

tell me tt i stil live..

i've nvr imagined switching from a discipline to another can be as tough as it is...
true i've struggled..

sometimes i wondered.. nut, hey but i'm still an associate engineer to say e least. period.

why am i not going out and start earning my 2k.. why am i not going out to finally get out of this cycle tat revolves ard the money makes e world goes round..

i constantly struggle with myself. its a struggle for freedom n yet.. its another burning desire to try to make the best outta my life.. i diden think life wud b so fragile til WTC fell.. oh yes.. being blond deserved to be bombed anyway.. den they said allah told them to.. i can imagine allah's embrassement. when he saw jesus at pearly gates.. and all he cud say is : bro really not me..

this yr has been a tough 'adaption'. like a commando.. i tried blending into these foreign bases.. sometimes i feel my courage left me.. the courage of soldiering on.. inspirations left me for dead.. its just so disheartening..

now my papers are nearing.. not only i wan to get them off the blocks.. i wan to keep them right up there.. where another day of showcase fills my stone cold heart with pride..

after then i will keep that physco piles of tree-made rubbish.. locked in a cupboard for a sentence of a period.. on a charge of serial murders of my countless nights of sleep..

i cant wait to see the sun again..